Another Three Months of This, Really?

These last few months have been one of the crappiest periods of my life.  That's so weird to say, though, because at the same time, these past few months have been amazing.  I'm so blessed to have my family, and every day that I get to see Harper and Kaelin grow is just... wow!

But my husband has been non-existant.  He's still at Prototype (a 6 month long, intensive training program) and he's working himself sick.  Unlike his other schools, Prototype is go at your own pace.  You have 22 weeks to do a certain amount of work, but you can finish as early as 13.  Of course, you have to get special permission to finish that early, but it's possible.  More realistically, most people start to finish around 16 weeks until about 20. 

Jason's at the end of week 13. 

There are circumstances beyond his control that's making it really hard for everyone to get qualified.  There's just not enough staff and not enough time to get everything done that needs done.  The way it works is, you have to get a certain number of points a day to stay about the curve, the curve being the number of points you need at any given time to finish in week 22.  If you fall below the curve, you're dinq (delinquint in qualification).  If you're dinq, bad things happen.  You get to work 14 hour days instead of 12.  If you get far enough ahead of the curve, good things happen.  You get to work 10 hour days instead of 12. 

Thankfully, Jason's never been dinq.

He's been on reduced hours most of prototype, even though he doesn't usally take them.  Most of the time, he goes into work a couple hours early so he can get a head start.  While he's at work, he rarely takes breaks.  He eats lunch at his desk while he studies.  Needless to say, after 10+ hours a day, 7 days a week of this, he's turned into a zombie.

He comes home and falls asleep in the middle of a conversation.  When he does have the energy to talk, it's always about work.  He's so stressed because he feels like he should be doing better.  But he's one of 3 mechanics on his crew who aren't dinq.  Really, there's nothing else he can do, but that doesn't stop him from trying.  I love that he's so ambitious and wants to do well.  One of the problems from our early relationship was that he was a bit too content sitting in front of the computer all day while I was at work.  I just want him to lighten up a little. 

I've tried to tell him it doesn't get much easier after he graduates.  Who cares if he qualifies week 16 instead of week 22?  Absolutely nobody.  When he gets to his next boat, he has to do it all over again.  Welcome aboard, you're dinq and all that.  Except it's going to be worse.  Instead of training, it's a real boat.  You know, one that actually goes underwater and fights the bad guys.  When he gets to the fleet, he'll have duty days.  He'll have underways.  He'll have deployments.  We aren't going to see much of him at all.  I've been doing this for over ten years. 

I'm a Navy wife.  I accept this.

But he's at a training command now, and damn it, I want my husband back.

Note:  I know that there are people who have it worse off than we do.  My heart goes out to the guys who work just as hard as Jason, but still have to put in extra hours.  However, your complaints that you don't get to see your family because you work 14 hour days don't weigh very much when you go home, ignore your wife and play Halo for 6 hours.  It also doesn't make sense to complain that you don't get to see your husband if you go out with your friends every night after he gets home.  I also really don't care that you don't get to see your boyfriend because he's on a different crew.  You date a fellow sailor, what did you expect?  Don't bitch about your 6 month deployment when you spend more time playing WoW than with your kids.


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